Is it time for me to commit suicide ?

You need to get help IMMEDIATELY! I would say look in the phone book, but I know in your state you probably don't want to be searching for numbers. Pick up the phone & call 911 & tell them you are thinking of committing suicide. They will refer you to the nearest mental health care facility to get the help you need. Or call 411 & ask if there is a suicide hotline & talk to someone & ask them how you can get help, but don't just sit there & do nothing, reach out to someone. Please don't wait, pick up the phone right now.